The TFA Model: How our mind really works

‘Dealing with an audience with their own ideas and mindsets. Not open for discussion’ – this is what our participants yesterday said was their biggest challenge in communication.

That one person, that one situation that is still challenging even though in most situations you are a great communicator.

One thing that always works for me is to NOT trust myself in that situation.

Why? Because I know I’m deleting, distorting and generalising (T-F-A model) and when my emotions are high then my intelligence isn’t.

Reach out to a buddy. Step back and ask some questions.

And when the emotions come down, then step back into the conversation – you may find it’s not that challenging any more…

Our minds “compute” information and data differently.

This sometimes leads to misinterpretation, miscommunication and misrepresentations. And therein lies some of the issues we encounter in the context of communication and building or improving relationships.

Both types, the ones at work as well as at home.

When we start to understand what happens in the mind – the way we DELETE, DISTORT and GENERALISE data (what we see and hear) – and how that can affect our FEELINGS or emotional state…we can start the work of not being so quick to JUDGE, ASSUME and ACCUSE.

Instead we can start the work on being #TheSkilledCommunicator.

Meenakshi Sarup in action here as she shares THE TFA MODEL of communication which is the first step in the work needed to become skilled at being effective communicators. A skill we all need, especially for those of us in the roles of leadership.

When thoughts affect emotions, that has an impact on the way we ACT and BEHAVE – what we say, what we do. And what we say and do, matters.

Running a customised workshop for Singapore Institute Management – this is our third run of the session with a fourth happening already scheduled.

#simpd #virtualtrainings #thechangebusiness #theskilledcommunicator #difficultpeople